What should a family screen time agreement include?

When screens stop in the evening, what comes first (such as homework), which apps count towards any limit, how extra time can be asked for, where phones sleep overnight, being safe and kind online, what happens if something goes wrong, what each of you promises, and a date to review it.

At what age should children help write the rules?

From the start. Even an eight-year-old can have a real say in parts of it. By 11 or 12, children should be helping to set the limits themselves and making their case at the review.

Why should my child sign it?

Signing turns a rule handed down into a promise your child has made. When the limit arrives, the conversation is about keeping their word rather than about who's in charge.

How often should we review it?

Set a date when you write it, often a few months ahead, and review it at natural points like the start of a school year or the holidays. The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests reviewing a family media plan at the start of each school year and during breaks.

Guides · How to

How to write a family screen time agreement that actually holds

Most family rules about screens are made up on the spot, at the worst possible moment. An agreement you write together, calmly and once, is different.

4 min read · Published 28 September 2026 · Last reviewed 28 September 2026

Roo pointing to a notice pinned to a wooden sign

In short

A family screen time agreement is a short set of rules you and your child write together and both sign. It works best when your child has a real say, when it covers when screens stop, what comes first, which apps count and how to ask for more, and when it has a review date. Write it once, calmly, not in the middle of an argument.

Key facts

Write it together, and let your child have a real say.
Cover when screens stop, what comes first, which apps count and how to ask for more.
Both sign it, and set a date to review it.

Why an agreement, and not just rules

Rules made at 8pm, mid-argument, feel arbitrary to a child, because they often are. An agreement written in advance, with your child in the room and with a say, is a different kind of thing. It's something they helped make.

It's also what the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends: a family media plan, made together, that sets out your own family's priorities rather than a universal number.

What to put in it

A good agreement covers:

When screens stop in the evening, and when they can start in the morning.
What comes first, such as homework or chores, and who checks it's done.
Which apps count towards any daily limit, and which are always allowed (school apps, calls, messages to family).
How to ask for more time, and what a fair answer looks like.
Where phones sleep overnight.
Being safe and kind online: private details, people they know, photos and money.
If something goes wrong: they tell you, and they won't lose the phone for telling.
What each of you promises. It goes both ways, and that includes your own phone at dinner.
A review date, so it can grow with them.

How to write it together

Pick a calm moment. A weekend afternoon, not straight after a row.
Let your child go first on some of it. Ask what they think a fair limit is. Many children suggest something close to what you'd have picked.
Explain your reasons where you hold a line, especially on sleep and safety.
Keep it short. Two pages is plenty.
Both sign it. Then put it somewhere you'll both see it.

Keep it working

Review it on the date you set, and at natural points like the start of a school year.
Give more say as they grow. By 11 or 12, children should be co-setting the limits and making their case at the review. Autonomy that's earned tends to stick; rules imposed at that age invite workarounds.
Treat a hard week as information, not failure. Look at when it broke down and change one small thing.

Start with the free version

Our free Family Digital Agreement walks you through all of this in about ten minutes. You can fill it in with your child, print it on two A4 pages, or share it by link. If a first phone is on the way, start with the first phone readiness check.

Kairoo

Your agreement, kept for you.

Write it together, both sign it, and Kairoo holds it on their phone: the heads-ups, the stop, and a fair answer when they ask for more.

Get Kairoo on iPhone Start with the free agreement Or start with the free agreement Tell me when Android is ready

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Questions parents ask

What should a family screen time agreement include?: When screens stop in the evening, what comes first (such as homework), which apps count towards any limit, how extra time can be asked for, where phones sleep overnight, being safe and kind online, what happens if something goes wrong, what each of you promises, and a date to review it.
At what age should children help write the rules?: From the start. Even an eight-year-old can have a real say in parts of it. By 11 or 12, children should be helping to set the limits themselves and making their case at the review.
Why should my child sign it?: Signing turns a rule handed down into a promise your child has made. When the limit arrives, the conversation is about keeping their word rather than about who's in charge.
How often should we review it?: Set a date when you write it, often a few months ahead, and review it at natural points like the start of a school year or the holidays. The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests reviewing a family media plan at the start of each school year and during breaks.

Sources

How to Make a Family Media Plan, HealthyChildren.org (American Academy of Pediatrics), last updated 20 January 2026
A self-determination theory perspective on parenting, Joussemet, Landry & Koestner, Canadian Psychology 49(3), 194–200, 2008

Last reviewed 28 September 2026. Kairoo checks these pages when the rules or the research change; if you spot something out of date, tell us at hello@kairoo.family.