Before the first phone · free

Is your child ready for a phone? A check, not a test.

Eight short steps and a reading: what the phone is for, where your child will spend time, what to set up before the first problem, what worries you, six honest signals, and what they still need to practise. Then the agreement.

Free · eight short steps · leave an email for your reading · The Family Digital Agreement · Back to Kairoo

Work through it on your own first, then with your child. There are no right answers, only honest ones. Eight short steps, about five minutes, and at the end a reading: green, amber or red, with what to do about it.

Step 1 of 8
About the phone
1 · Purpose: why now?
2 · Platforms: where will they spend time?

Do we understand the spaces our child is entering, not only the device? If a name on this list is a mystery, spend ten minutes in it with them before the phone arrives.

3 · Protections: set up before the first problem
4 · What worries you most

Pick up to three. The worries decide which protections matter, and which conversations to have first.

5 · Readiness signals

Six honest questions. They give the reading on page two.

6 · Practice: what does your child need to learn?
7 · Before you hand it over

Four weeks after the phone arrives is about right. Leave it blank to write the date in by hand.

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Kairoo First Phone Readiness Check Page 1 of 2

First Phone Readiness Check

A practical check for parents before a child’s first phone. It is meant to slow you down, not to gatekeep. The questions matter more than the boxes.

For
, aged
Done by
Right now
; the phone is coming

1Purpose: why now?

The phone is for .
Honestly, the main reason: .

2Platforms: where they will spend time

Mostly .
Do we understand those spaces, not only the device? The ones to explore together first: the ones we have never opened ourselves.

3Protections: set up before the first problem

In place before the phone becomes fully independent: .

4What worries us most

. Confidence in setting up healthy boundaries: .Confidence in setting up boundaries: .
kairoo.family · built with Nesta · follows guidance from the NSPCC, Childnet, Internet Matters, the UK Safer Internet Centre and Ofcom
Kairoo · First Phone Readiness Check Page 2 of 2

5Readiness signals

Stops when time is up
Would come to us if something upset them
Handles rules they don’t like
Has practised tricky situations
Clear phone rules already
Open to a shared agreement

6The reading

Not a clinical assessment; a reflection tool. Three honest categories, and the one that fits is marked.

Green: ready with light support. Clear boundaries, a signed agreement and a regular review are enough. Next step: write the Family Digital Agreement together this week.
Amber: ready with structure. Some independence is fine, but write the agreement first and work through the setup list in section 3 before the phone, not after.
Red: prepare before handing over. Slow down. Start with the conversation and the practice list below, then come back to the agreement in a few weeks.
Answer the six signals in section 5 to get a reading.

7Practice: what our child needs to learn

Before more freedom: .
One thing to practise before the phone arrives: .

8Before we hand it over

We’ll look at this again on .
kairoo.family · built with Nesta · follows guidance from the NSPCC, Childnet, Internet Matters, the UK Safer Internet Centre and Ofcom

Finished? Keep it: print, PDF, a link for the other grown-up.

Keep it

Your reading is ready.

Leave your email to see it here, and we’ll email you a link that reopens your readiness check, with the reading, on any phone or computer.

To print this readiness check, leave your email on the page at kairoo.family/first-phone and the print button appears.

What you get at the end

Your reading, green, amber or red, with what it means for your family. The five things to decide before the phone, in the order that matters. And the one document to write next, so the phone arrives with the rules already agreed. About five minutes, then it is yours to keep.

What to decide before a child’s first phone

Before a first phone, decide five things, in this order: why now (the real reason, not the pressure); where the child will actually spend time (the apps, not the handset); what is set up before the first problem (downtime, app approval, privacy settings set together, spending controls, and a bedtime routine with the phone out of the bedroom); what you will agree with each other, in writing; and what the child still needs to practise. Readiness is not a settings menu. A child who can stop when time is up, who would come to you if something upset them, and who has rehearsed the tricky moments is readier at ten than a child with none of that at thirteen. Ofcom’s 2026 report puts the jump at the move to secondary school: 56% of 10-year-olds own a phone, 83% of 11-year-olds do. That is the moment to do this check.

  • Why now. Travel, contact, clubs, secondary school and homework are reasons. “Everyone else has one” is a pressure. Both are allowed; know which one you are acting on.
  • Where, not what. Parents set up the phone; children live in WhatsApp, YouTube and Roblox. Ten minutes inside each, together, teaches you more than any settings page.
  • Set up before the first problem. Downtime, app approval and spending controls are five minutes each on the first day and an argument each on the tenth.
  • Agree it, in writing, both of you. The Family Digital Agreement is the other half of this check. A child who signs the rules keeps them; a child who is handed them tests them.
  • Practise the moments that matter. Stopping on time, asking for help, saying no in a group chat. These can be rehearsed on a tablet before there is a phone.
  • Review, then loosen. Four weeks after the phone arrives, sit down again. Trust grows when there is a plan for it to grow into.

How to read your answers

The reading on page two comes from the six readiness signals, and only from those. It is a reflection tool, not a test: green does not mean nothing can go wrong, and red does not mean no phone. Green families usually need the agreement and a review date. Amber families need the agreement plus the setup list done before the phone, and a few practice runs. Red families do best starting with the conversation, practising on a shared device for a few weeks, and coming back to the check.

Three questions parents ask about the check
What age is right for a first phone?

There is no right age; there is a right family. Ofcom's 2026 report shows ownership jumping from 56% of 10-year-olds to 83% of 11-year-olds, so most families decide at the move to secondary school. The check asks whether your child can stop on time, would tell you when something goes wrong, and has practised the tricky moments; that matters more than the birthday.

Is the reading a score?

No. It counts seven honest answers and sorts them into three categories to help you decide what to do first. Green does not mean nothing can go wrong, and red does not mean no phone.

What do we do after the check?

Write the Family Digital Agreement together, on paper, before the phone arrives. If the reading was amber or red, do the setup list in section 3 and the practice list in section 7 first. Then, when the phone comes, Kairoo can hold the time part of the agreement.

The next step, whatever the reading

Write the agreement together.

Two pages, about ten minutes, both of you sign it. It covers what the phone is for, when screens finish, where the phone sleeps, staying safe and kind, and what each of you promises. When the phone arrives, Kairoo can hold the time part of it.

Write the Family Digital Agreement Get Kairoo on iPhone